Controlling myself.

My tears keeps on pouring.
I know it never dries up since for so long but I thought it could slow down.
It's really pouring out now.
Pieces of my heart are breaking more and more.
I really wanna go to somewhere so so faraway and mend my heart.
I don't mind if I'm alone as long as I'm far far away.
That is what i really want now.
I get so embarassed nowadays coz I keep on tearing even when i'm out in the public.
It is really uncontrolable.
I want to stop thinking about it but it gets more and more difficult.
I even thought of asking for few days leave from work as I don't want it to affect my work.
But unfortunately I have not even done with my 3 months yet & not entitle to have my leave.
Life is really tough.
I thought this year would be a better,happier year for me..
But the happiness is only a while ..
sadness,misery,hurt & pain sets in,
in replacement of everything...

And if there is anyone reading my blog,I'm really sorry for having too many sad posts.
These are not for display or sympathy.
These are the content of my heart.
I write what I feel.
It's just that hard copies are difficult to be kept and that is why online diary is the best solution for now.
At least I have somewhere to pour my feelings out.

I just don't know how long more am i going to have sad posts.
I'll try not to post up too many of those sad stuff.
But I write what I feel rite?
So bear with me.