I have got to do it.

It's making me crazy.
As the hours tick,i'm getting weaker & weaker.
How do i convinced myself that everything is gonna be fine?
Why is everything happening one after another without letting me gain some strength before i'm ready for the next...?
Why?
Why do people's Love changes and not mine?
Why can't I just stop Loving him and move on..??
Why he can and I can't?
Why?
Why can't I accept the fact that his Love for me has already died?
Why?
Why can't i ??
Why am i still hoping while he don't?
Why?
Am I stupid or what???
Dont i understand english?
Didnt he says that he is already happy with someone already?
What am i doing here still?
Waiting for the sky to drop??
I dunno...
I feel so powerless,helpless,worthless and many many more 'less'
Is Love this hurting?
why didnt i feel like this for my past relationships??
this is really an agony.
Let's take each day by day.
Don't hope anymore.
Just do what i wanna do and be happy with what I have for now.
I' just want to live life for my family,friends and my patients.
How long more till i'm gonna be in Love again?
Oh man...only God could open up my numb,'ice-cold' heart.

A note to my dearest mum,
thanks so much for being there for me always.
I really appreciate it so much.
I've never been this sad and to have you close to me consoling me was the biggest thing that happened.
The tears that you cried with me that night will always be remembered.
I was so touched that you really didnt put the blame to any party instead you talk so rationally to me.
Insya allah...
as long as i live I want to make you happy always.
I love you so much, Mak.
*deeply touched*
*hugs tightly*