Downtime.

My comp is down.
I think i need a new desktop.

Niways,
Happy advance Hari Raya.
Im at work now.
Haha!

More updates when i get my new comp.
:)

Where to go?

Vacation to Bangkok is confirmed.
Will be going in mid November during my consecutive off days with my working kakis.
And that would mark my first time travelling by Air.
Its ok,there is always first time for everything.
I just hope that situation in Bangkok will be very much settled by then.
Mom is freaking worried about my safety there.
I just pray that everything will be just fine.

In Mid December,
I will be having my last slot of annual leave.
Planning to bring my family to either Langkawi,Bintan or Tioman for a short vacation.
I want to bring mom for SPA sessions.
She is really into all these SPA thingy.
I also hope that i got a few more days to spare for Bestie.
Planning to go for a short trip with her too.
But still have not decided yet.
Hopefully we can decide on where to go soon.
Tell me soon alrite bestie?

Its already more than 2 weeks of Ramadhan.
Alhamdulilah,i havent missed a day.
I wish i could complete the whole month.
Syawal is coming...
My whole family have not even prepare our Baju Raya yet.
Frankly i'm not looking forward to it.
I feel sad coz Ramadhan is leaving soon.

I Prefer.

I feel so relieved now.
I've told Him that i can't pursue a relationship with him coz i simply can't develop a Love for him.
As for Him,
Ok ok...he is actually my Kekasih gelapku (Mus)...haha!
We shall just be how we used to be...
not expecting anything from each other..
I like it that way.
We are both cool with it.
:)
And we are so really missing each other so much coz its been a more than a month since our last meet-up!!
He has been complaining to me about how much he misses me..
I miss you too Lovey!

Dilemma.

Should i give it a try?
Or should i jus remain where i am now..?
His confessions seems so convincing...
While His Love seems real although wasn't as convincing as his..
He probably need more time to settle his own stuff although he is very matured in age..
He is on the other hand so confident about the future at a fairly young age.
I have not develop Love for him yet.
But i have so called fallen for him already.
I have known him for almost 4 years already.
And i have known him for approximately 9mths.

I'm in a dilemma.

What happened?

Yes,I dont know what happened to him.
He seem to be so short-tempered now.
He gets mad really quickly.
I will still drive him mad even though i 'm polite in whatever way i could.
I understand that probably he gets irritated coz i asked him whether are we like meeting or not and then i decided to msg him the next day again saying that :

''since we r both busy,then we just forget abt meeting and i shall just keep those stuff and if ever i find that it is haunting me abt the past,i shall just discard it but for now i'm really fine.
those are just memories :) .''

That was what i msged him.
And then i got a reply from him which sounded so rude.
I was shocked.
I didnt know that my msg could cause him to be so unhappy.
To think that the words in the msg comes from him is really almost unexpected.
Coz i know him as a polite,courteous,patient and almost impossible to-get-angry person.

I just thought that if i could resolve the matter earlier it would be better right...
it wont have to be delayed..
And i never want to trouble anybody coz i know everyone is busy with work and all...
He is the one who initiated to meet to pass over the stuff personally to him.
I appreciate his concern though.
But look at the situation..
You are always busy and i'm on shiftwork...
If we ever gets to meet it would be like weeks later....
And i don't want to be always thinking abt the matter almost everyday before it could resolved.
I just thought that i should come to a conclusion and keep moving on.
Am i not doing the right actions..???

But if my good intentions doesn't meant good for him,
I really dont know.
My mom did ask abt all these when we were sahur-ing just now.
I couldn't contain myself when i told her abt what he replied to me.
I just burst into tears.
My mom reassured me that probably he said it out of anger.
My dad reprimanded me not to msg him anymore.
My dad was really serious and he really meant what he said.
I told that I have stopped msging him or emailing him for like 2 months already but he is the one who wants me to contact him back coz he wants to meet me personally to get the stuff.
My dad just warned me that from now on he don't want me to cry or said abt him anymore.
I just couldnt stop crying and i wasnt able to finish up my food.
I went to the kitchen,get 2 tabs of Panadol and then went to my room.
Looks like my flu and sore throat is not going to get any better.
I'm so done with all these.